I suck.

Where I am: my bed. And if it wasn’t my Brother-in-Laws birthday this is where I would stay all day. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DAVE.

Listening to: Stevie Wonder ‘For Once in my life”

 

 

Hiya pals

 

It’s official – I suck.

I’m still a week behind on these posts but I am determined to catch up. I’ve just worked a 6 day week and have a couple more coming up but hopefully after that I will find time to catch up on the post I missed. I know it’s only one post but I was determined to catch up this week and I haven’t. Gosh darn it. I suck.

Here’s some other things I suck at…

Letting go of things

I know I have to learn to do this. I know. It’s just so bloody hard.

Not worrying what other people think

Again, something I wish I was great at. I am surrounded by people that could not give a hoot what others think of them but I still do, especially those I’m close with and those whose opinions I really value (which isn’t always the same thing). I’d like to think I have got a bit better at this over the years but I’m not all that sure.

Being ill.

Especially if it involves vomiting; I revert back to being 5 years old and just want my mum.

Being a ‘Lady’

 Honestly, who tf has the time or energy to do contouring and blending and highlighting etc etc everyday plus have salon inspired hair? Also, I can’t contour, I’m not sure I even know what it is. I have a mouth like a sewer. I am not afraid to get stuck in, get a bit dirty. I’d rather eat than cook (although I am ridiculously jealous of those ladies that can cook).

Me when I try to be clever with make up

Being around people I find attractive.

It’s embarrassing, I either start talking 10 to the dozen or I go shy and lose the ability to hold a conversation. Sometimes, if I’m lucky, I’ll flit between the two. I really thought at 27 I’d have grown out of this by now.

Being patient

I have no patience. Well, not none; I have a very small amount for children and the most amount for animals. I have no time for stupid people, people that have no common sense (judge me, I don’t care). I want everyone to learn as quick as me, work as fast as me and if you don’t get out my way.

My old boss (wassup, Dennis) in one of my reviews actually made me realise this lack of patience “You learn really fast and expect everyone else to as well, then when they don’t you think they are slow when actually they’re normal, you’re just really fast”

I haven’t really learnt how to deal with that because I still want the world and I still want it yesterday.

Not being emotional

 Most of my friends think I have no heart and a black soul. They are right to some extent. I cry more than you’d think and over things you’d not expect me to. Case and point – there was a duck in my road this week that had been hit and killed by a car (we live near a pond) when I saw it I went home and cried. Over a duck.

Taking care of myself

I rarely get 8 hours sleep, I’m sure I have toast for ‘dinner’ once a week and eat too much chocolate. The lack of size 8 figure is suddenly not so surprising. Also, are there people that can really ‘just have one’ biscuit with a cup of tea?

Making decisions

Oh man, I hate this about myself. I miss being 5 when my decisions were made for me.

Standing up for myself

Don’t get me wrong I can handle myself, I’m not one to sit back and not say something if someone is in my face. I am more likely to walk away from a confrontation though because I can’t be bothered with the shit. Sometimes I want to believe in the good in people and as a result let them walk all over me.

 

We’ve all gotta be rubbish at something though, right? It makes us human. At least that’s what I’m telling myself.